A downloadable game

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You suck.

Seriously. You suck. You’re a trash person and everybody knows it. Maybe you don’t but everybody else does.

Being a scumdump got you further than anything else in this life. You’re not going to change unless you absolutely have to. And right now, you don’t have to.

SHITBIRDS is a tabletop role-playing game for 3-5 players who want to get together and play awful people in any setting. Want to be negligent baristas at an unwittingly doomed coffee shop? Easy. Boastful blades-for-hire bullshitting their way through the high-fantasy countryside? Grab two six-sided dice and you're good to go. All the bosses from my worst jobs? They literally inspired the game.

With only two pages of rules and two stats to use, SHITBIRDS is quick to pick up and play. Slide it into a game night to play out the fates of the suckiest people you've ever met. See if they get kicked out for chaging their ways or for commiting to the scumbag lifestyle.

Just don't use this game to play out your abusive or facist fantasies. That makes you a shitbird in real life.


Buy Now$1.00 USD or more

In order to download this game you must purchase it at or above the minimum price of $1 USD. You will get access to the following files:

SHITBIRDS.pdf 132 kB
SHITBIRDS_ButWithoutTheBirdDrawing.pdf 123 kB


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(2 edits)

Ran a 1hr scenario with one player.  Player was a shitbird of a billionaire who was running for Mayor while getting kickbacks from a toxic landfill, and at the same time developing housing across the street (new homes were on top of a cemetery, too).

We wanted our shitbird game to punch-up.

It was a blazing tire-fire of a game (in all the best ways).

10 out of 10.

You can listen to the podcast here: https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/5utVhVUz6vb


I ran a session of SHITBIRDS yesterday where the conceit is that yall're a bunch of assholes put in various social situations to try to out asshole each other and enjoyed it quite a lot.

The scenario was that the players were a bunch of teenagers who'd snuck into a movie theater and were sitting in some seats that didn't belong to them when the people whose seats they were showed up a few minutes late to the movie.  Shenanigans began immediately.

It's a 2pg rpg so I recommend it if you wanna play something quickly, in a casual setting, and/or with new players (though existing players will also have plenty of fun!).


played this as shitty barista’s in a terrible shitty no good coffee shop. 10/10 will play again!